I just got these comments about a project plan that I wrote and dont know how to edit what I have to include these comments. So I basically need someone to rewrite and incorporate the comments
◆ Background
● Business context
○ Can you introduce the customer by answering these sorts of
questions…
◆ What is the Sea Discovery Center? Where? (https://sea.wwu.edu/)
◆ What is their mission? Their purpose?
○ You say “other items” and “other things” - get more specific. Give
examples on the sorts of display information you’ll be providing if
that is helpful.
● Customer industry
○ Do similar centers in other places have kiosks like this?
◆ Can you provide any examples of what centers, and what
kiosks they have in place (if any)?
○ Is there a product for sale anywhere that would fulfill this need?
◆ If there is a product for sale, what is preventing the Sea
Discovery Center from buying it (too expensive, too
complex, needs too many of them, etc.)?
◆ Business opportunity
● Customer’s need
○ “needs guidance” - do the customers need guidance on navigating
the center or learning about what the Sea Discovery Center is or
learning about the animals/exhibits?
○ “because of no such kiosks customers miss the regular exhibit” -
what does regular mean in this context?
● Industrial context
○ “it will cause demand for the same kiosks at other centers” - this
makes the reader think that there are no other kiosks in existence
at centers like these. Is that true?
○ Because you say the customer’s need is essentially getting more
out of the center’s exhibits, maybe the industrial context has more
to do with making the Sea Discovery Center’s visitors enjoy their
time more, as opposed to improving kiosks and producing/selling
a lot of them.
here is what I have so far
Background
The goal of the project is to create informational display kiosks at the ‘Sea Discovery Center’ to provide detailed information about the displays and other items, without the intervention of any human being. The project is to set up a kiosk which will be informational kiosks to provide information about the exhibitions, events, items, and other things which are present at the Sea Discovery Center.
Business Opportunity
The customer needs this project to ensure that they have access to the information which might be useful for them to have a better experience at the ‘Sea Discovery Center’. Also, many customers are visiting the discovery center for the first time and therefore it means that they need guidance, and therefore to provide each of them with consistent guidance these kiosks will be set up and be used by the customers to access information about the exhibits and the animals which are available at the Sea Discovery Center.
The other need of the project is that because of no such kiosks customers miss the regular exhibit, but now after this kiosk customers will be up to date with any exhibition information which is happening in the Discovery Center and therefore will increase the traction received at the Discovery Center.
The need fits the industrial context in a manner like when the kiosks will be set up at the Sea Discovery Center it will cause demand for the same kiosks at other centers as well which will help the industry to produce more and sell more kiosks leading to an increase in the revenue. Also, this setup will help the industry to understand what other customization the industry can do to the kiosks to make them better, which can be done and make the kiosks more comprehensive.