Deadline June 28, 2012 time 5pm only 100 words Your own words, referencing Document Preview: 9Managing Conflict in RelationshipsDefining Interpersonal Conflict• When people in “I-You” or “I-Thou”...

Deadline June 28, 2012

time 5pm

only 100 words

Your own words, referencing

Chapter 9 9 Managing Conflict in Relationships Defining Interpersonal Conflict • When people in “I-You” or “I-Thou” relationships have different views, interests, or goals and feel a need to resolve those differences  Expressed disagreement  Interdependence  The felt need for resolution Principles of Conflict • Conflict is natural in relationships • Conflict may be expressed overtly or covertly • Social groups share the meaning of conflict behaviors • Conflict can be managed well or poorly • Conflict can be good for individuals and relationships Orientations to Conflict • Lose-Lose • Win-Lose • Win-Win Responses to Conflict • The exit response • The neglect response • The loyalty response • The voice response Unproductive Communication Patterns During Conflict • The early stages  Communication that fails to confirm individuals  Cross-complaining  Negative climate and mind reading • The middle stages  Kitchen-sinking  Frequent interruptions • The later stages  Counterproposals  Excessive miscommunication Constructive Communication Patterns During Conflict • The early stages  Communicators confirm each other by recognizing and acknowledging each other’s concerns and feelings • The middle stages  Stay focused on main issues (agenda building)  Bracketing  Don’t interrupt except for clarification  Recognize and acknowledge each other’s point of view • The later stages  Contracting Constructive vs. Unproductive Communication Conflict Management Skills • Attend to the relationship level of meaning • Communicate supportively • Listen mindfully • Own your feelings, thoughts, and issues • Check perceptions • Look for points of agreement • Look for ways to preserve the other’s face • Imagine how you will feel in the future Guidelines for Effective Communication During Conflict • Focus on the overall communication system • Time conflict purposefully • Aim for win-win conflict • Honor yourself, your partner, and the relationship • Show grace when appropriate Fundamentals of Interpersonal Communications week 11 discussion Week 11: Week Eleven - Class Discussion NOTE You must not copy and paste information. Do not copy or paste information / Please ……. (In your own words, referencing) Your own words, referencing Only 100 words Only 100 words Instructional Objectives for this activity: Describe how to manage conflict in interpersonal communication. Conflict within relationships is inevitable, but approaches to handling conflict can be positive or negative. Forgiveness is one way to positively manage conflict. Reflect on the new ideas about managing conflict which you have learned this week, and discuss them with your classmates. Respond to all of the following prompts in the class discussion section of your online course: 1. What are the characteristics of forgiveness? 2. How is forgiveness a part of conflict? 3. Describe an example from your own experiences in forgiveness that was part of the conflict process. Chapter 9, "Managing Conflicts in Relationships," pages 219-248. Chapter 9: Managing Conflict in Relationships "Sometimes it's worse to win a fight than to lose." —Billie Holliday Now that you have assessed your relationship investments and understand the features of satisfying relationships, it's time to examine how conflicts can be handled in a relationship. After all, Conflict is Natural in Relationships (Conflict Principle #1, page 225-226). What? Conflict is natural? hmm....how can that be? Our text points out that conflict indicates the people involved are connected to each other, and the presence of conflict is not necessarily an indication of a troubled relationship. The trick to effective conflict management is to handle the conflict in a constructive way that doesn't harm the relationship. Doing so can actually promote personal and relational growth. Orientations to Conflict A person's pattern of response to a conflict is often learned in the family. One's view toward conflict can determine their approach to the conflict. Basically, there are 3 orientations or views toward conflict. Lose-Lose: this orientation assumes that expressing conflict is unhealthy for everyone involved in the relationship. It assumes that conflict is inevitably negative, but it works well when trying to figure out if there is a need to engage in the conflict, especially if the issue is less important than others. Win-Lose: this orientation assumes that expressing conflict leads to one person benefiting and the other person not achieving a desired outcome. Win-Win: this orientation assumes that expressing conflict leads to all people involved working together to come up with a solution that is acceptable to everyone. To assess your orientation to conflict, please see page 250, Everyday Applications #3, Identify Your Conflict Orientations. This brief assessment will help you to understand if you view conflict from a win-lose, a lose-lose or a win-win orientation. Responses to Conflict In addition to the orientations (views) toward conflict, researchers have also identified some relatively consistent responses that people use when in conflict. Exit responses are used when we leave a relationship, either physically or psychologically. This tends to be a destructive response associated with lose-lose and win-lose orientations. Neglect responses are used when we minimize or deny the existence of the conflict. It is generally destructive and passive with a lose-lose or win-lose orientation. Loyalty responses are used when we remain committed to continuing the relationship and choose to put up with the differences. Loyalty responses are passive responses, sometimes in the form of a silent allegiance, but are also constructive in that they preserve the relationship. The orientation is lose-lose. Voice responses are used when we actively seek to talk openly about and resolve the conflict. Problems and tensions are identified. There is also a desire to deal with the problem and/or tension. This is the most constructive way to respond to conflict with a win-win orientation. The response you use in dealing with a conflict is determined by the situation, and whether you want to maintain the relationship. The author of our text states, "Developing skill in a range of responses to conflict increases your ability to communicate sensitively and effectively" (page 235). Interpersonal conflict can occur only between people who perceive themselves as interdepdent at the time of the conflict. Obviously, we are interdependent in I – thou relationships with close friends, family members, and romantic partners. In additions, we may be temporarily interdependent with people in I- you relationships, which would include people we know only casually. For example, Russell and Brittany meet at a party and get into a boisterous argument ever politics. Although they do not have a close relationship, during their conversation they do depend on each other: Russell wants to persuade Brittany to his political views, and she wants to change the him to hers. In that moment, they are interdependent because each wants to persuade other’s mind and that cannot happen without the other’s cooperation. My colleagues and I have different food preferences but we don’t experience conflict because we don’t need to agree about food. Interpersonal conflict exits only when it is expressed by people who have some degree of interdependence at a particular time. Conflict can be managed well or poorly: People respond to conflict in a verity of ways, from physical attack to verbal aggression to collaborative problem solving. Although each method may resolve differences, some are clearly preferable to others. Depending on how we handle disagreements, conflict can either promote continuing closeness or tear a relationship apart. One of the main people do not know how to identify or express. We may feel deep fisappointment, resentment, or anger toward someone we care about, and this is difficult to manage. Our discussion in Chapter 7 should help you identify your feeling and choose effective ways to communicate your emotions in conflict situations. Other skills we’ve discussed such as using I language and monitoring the self-serving bias will also help you manage the feelings that often accompany conflict. Reference: Wood, J. (2013). Interpersonal communication: Everyday encounters, (7th Ed.). Boston, MA: Wadsworth Cengage Learning. Fundamentals of Interpersonal Communications week 11 discussion Week 11: Week Eleven - Class Discussion NOTE You must not copy and paste information. Do not copy or paste information / Please ……. (In your own words, referencing) Your own words, referencing Only 100 words Only 100 words Instructional Objectives for this activity: Describe how to manage conflict in interpersonal communication. Conflict within relationships is inevitable, but approaches to handling conflict can be positive or negative. Forgiveness is one way to positively manage conflict. Reflect on the new ideas about managing conflict which you have learned this week, and discu ss them with your classmates. Respond to all of the following prompts in the class discussion section of your online course: 1. What are the characteristics of forgiveness? 2. How is forgiveness a part of conflict? 3. Describe an example from your own experience s in forgiveness that was part of the conflict process. Chapter 9, "Managing Conflicts in Relationships," pages 219 - 248.